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Misunderstandings

9/3/2020

17 Comments

 
​Since COVID-19, I haven’t been blogging very often.  Not because I don’t want too, but with the shop being so busy and working here on my own, I didn’t have time to play with words.  But, after a comment was dropped on my Encompassing Designs FB page by a disgruntled person that came to the shop, I can’t help but present my side.
 
Last week there was a knock on the shop door.  A woman was standing so close to the door I couldn’t unlock and open it to see what she wanted.  Several times I motioned with my hands for her to step back, I even tried to shout through the door, asking her to backup so I can open it. She just looks confused. Our big 32” wide door opens outward and pretty much covers the entire step; it is impossible for it to sweep out without knocking someone to the sidewalk. 

And here is where it degrades….there is a pandemic happening and you and I both need 6 feet of distance….I not only need it, I want it for your protection as well as mine.  I see you have two children with you standing to your left and not getting the response I need for you to step back; I go over to the window and tap on it where there is a sign that says I am closed due to COVID.  My intent was to get you to move to the window away from the door so I could open it to see how I could assist you.  But it seems the tapping on the sign instantly pissed you off and you shot me a hateful look and then hustled away with your children in tow.  I was rooted to the spot trying to process your anger or I would have run back to the door, opened it and hollered to get your attention but that old doormat inside of me, that bullied child and battered wife of a previous life, wouldn’t allow my feet to move.  I’ve written about this before, how rudeness and anger paralyze me, I’m pathetic I know, but old crap surfaces fast when prodded. 

My shop is not open to the public.  This early in the pandemic, I don’t believe that it is safe for Shane, Deborah or me to allow people in the shop.  If I can’t protect them, I can’t in all conscience be the catalyst that exposes them. I know the entire province seems to be opened up, pretty much every business in my small town is, but I believe it is premature.  Just because the virus hasn’t infiltrated our town doesn’t mean it isn’t coming or perhaps it is already here by way of asymptomatic carriers.  There are so many visitors in this town walking around, with license plates from across Canada and the US parked along the streets.   There is sometimes no room on the sidewalks to pass and people almost touch shoulders.  No one steps back or moves to avoid complete strangers.  I sometimes people watch from the shop window and I shake my head because I really don’t understand.  Very few, a small percentage wear masks while walking around and they only don them because it is a rule to enter stores.  I realize that a very small percent of people die from the virus but all it takes is that one untested asymptomatic carrier to meet up with the right person and  a statistic is made. 

This woman’s reaction ruined my afternoon and I lamented to my husband and Deborah who has been helping me catch up on pattern orders, working in the back room and respecting each other’s space.  It took a while to calm down, and then I started wondering why I am even doing this when most of the door experiences have been trying.  I’d say 85% of the people that knock on my door, tourists as well as rug hookers, don’t adhere to the rules of the pandemic.  Some aren’t wearing masks at all, or pull them out of a pocket and put it on only because they see I’m wearing one. How are these people protecting themselves or me with a mask crumpled in their jeans pocket or purse and not handled with sanitized hands?  I’ve watched hundreds of shoppers putting masks on and taking them off after browsing every shop, handling them over and over, are not these mask covered in whatever they’ve hands have touched?   How is this protecting anyone?

Some grab the door knob as I open it, almost pulling me out.  I’ve learned to grasp it tightly as I ease it open.  If they step back as the door opens, they jump back on the step becoming almost face to face with me.  Others pull off their masks to speak to me as if somehow, we are both safe because they know me? I know its difficult speaking through fabric but I'm willing to raise my voice to for clarity. The masks sometimes dangle on one ear providing no protection at all or the best one, the mask is below their nose only covering their mouth.  The majority of people don't want to step back to the sidewalk or on the grassy area in front of the window but the few that have,  made for a very pleasant experience and gave us time for bit of a catch-up with their lives. 

Customers sometimes come in groups, or with husbands or children.  What happened to one person per family like at the grocery stores?  If I open somewhere down the road there will be a one person rule at a time in the shop and there will be guidelines to follow so we don’t have to disinfect the entire store between customers.  I haven’t figured out a way to do this with selling such tactile products and I don't want the shop to look like my mother's living room sofa, wrapped in plastic so we can hose it down.   

I believe we are in difficult times; I believe there is a pandemic and I believe the numbers reported. Worldwide, 275,00 people, on average, are infected daily and on average, 6000 people die each day.  As of Sept 3rd, there are over 870,000 deaths worldwide and that is only what is reported.  And the daily infections and deaths rise every day as the virus picks up momentum. Just numbers eh?  Well let me show you something.  Here is a photo of a stadium that holds 3000 people, I’ve put two of them together.  This is how many people (on average) die daily from this pandemic worldwide.  Seeing the numbers as people is unsettling and mind blowing and its what keeps me being vigilant with caution.  That’s a lot of loved ones, friends and family......
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When I open the door and tell people I am only open for curbside pickup and mail order, I always ask if there is anything in particular I can help them with from the doorway.  Sometimes people request products, but many times I’m told no, they just want to get in and browse.  Or when assisting a customer at the door with items they wish to see, they are always too close and sometimes reach out and touch the products I’m showing them before I can react, enough that I now say, “no touchy.”  That seems to annoy people, everything I do seems to annoy some people because they are frustrated doing business this way.  We are frustrated too. We are all in the same row boat, whether we make it to the destination or sink all comes down to how we handle the oars.    I would love to throw open my doors and allow the summer trade in, that's what I rely on to support me through the winter.  These are uncertain times for all businesses.  We are all hurting but doing the best we can.  When the dust settles many will be gone, some will prosper but most will limp along until they can regain a foothold. 

As for me, I’m sorry but I can’t risk my health on a wool sale.  This shop is not my life.   I have not opened up the bubble that my husband and I float around in.  We haven’t gone anywhere and no one has been in our house since February, absolutely no one, I even had to give up having my house cleaned, hopefully only temperately but I fear I may have lost my spot.  Having my house cleaned was my gift to myself, and we love Larry.  If my husband and I see fit to continue to isolate it is our choice and the right one for us.    I hear “you gotta live” in reference to our lack of socializing or eating in restaurants. and I say be my guest, do as you please, go anywhere you wish.  I can respect your decision and the way you live your life even if I don’t agree but please respect that I don’t feel the same. 
  
I make allowance for this behavior because I know we are going through unprecedented times. But it makes me uneasy when I am working to protect myself.  I know we are all trying to deal with the pandemic the best way we can to ensure a happy outcome.   I know I’m fodder around the proverbial water cooler, many think I am wrong to not open my doors to the public or allow friends in our home.  I too, hope I am wrong, that the experts are wrong, I really, really do.  I will be the first to admit it if I’m proven wrong.  But in the meantime, I am listening to the scientists, the doctors and the pandemic experts and keeping a watchful eye on the world reports. 

I’m sending parcels out all over the world.  I’ll bet every one of my customers like and appreciate that I practice a high degree of caution, so their items are coming from not just a perfume and smoke free environment, but a a COVID free one too.  
​
I’ve seen so much since the outbreak, a lot of negative attitudes and people being hollered at and called names as the unbeliever’s bully and persecute the believers.  It’s a very strange world we live in right now and it will probably get worse before it gets better.  We really need to be kind to one another no matter what side of the fence we sit on. 

This latest incident has prompted me to make a sign that says (Please Step Back From The Door 6 Feet).  This should solve the problem of opening the door.    

Anyway, this is my viewpoint and I promised myself a while back to stop preaching about the pandemic, no one really wants to hear my opinion.  But I don’t like to be judged unfairly or have anyone assume I was being rude when it couldn’t be further from the truth.  I appreciate all my customers and I want to keep us both safe and well.  My mother always said, “don’t believe anything you hear and only half of what you see”.  
17 Comments
Brigitte Thompson
9/3/2020 07:31:05 pm

I applaud your caution and encourage you to stick by your guns. Too many people take the relaxation of precautions as open season to resume their daily activities. I have been to your shop and found you and your staff to be warm and welcoming. As a total stranger and newbie to hooking, you were incredibly patient with my dumb beginner questions and took time away from other duties to insure I was properly looked after. Do not let this experience and rude people in general get you down or depress you. It is their problem if they take offence because you stand up for your personal safety and want to protect your loved ones. Do not let those people change who you are. I loved my experience shopping with you. Your help and patience to a "wet behind the ears" is one of the reasons I stuck with hooking. I will continue to do business with you and hope when I return to Nova Scotia you will still be offering your products with that down home Maritime attitude.. hang in there... this too will pass!

Reply
Liz Carr
9/4/2020 06:24:24 am

Do not apologize. This pandemic thing isn't new, and the "me, me, me" attitude is frustrating and rude.

Reply
Joanna Turchin
9/4/2020 07:43:36 am

Hi Christine
You are totally right and I agree with you 100 percent. You were too nice! There are many morons still in this universe that do not believe Covid 19 but they have absolutely no right to possibly endanger your or your family and staff's life!
As I have stated in the past, it is totally acceptable to fire a customer.

Reply
Cathy
9/4/2020 12:54:17 pm

Well said...Stay safe...🌈🌈🐑🐑🐑

Reply
Adean
9/4/2020 12:54:42 pm

Being a small business owner is hard enough, especially during a pandemic. Respecting people's space goes a long way ... it's not an unreasonable request.

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Beth
9/4/2020 12:55:06 pm

Hugs, Christine. Your shop, your rules. xoxo

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Ghislaine
9/4/2020 12:55:43 pm

Well said...& protecting everyone!...Bravo!...G.

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Sherrie
9/4/2020 12:56:25 pm

Ghislaine R. Parent very well said. Everyone has the right to protect themselves their way!

Reply
Laura link
9/4/2020 03:14:56 pm

Good for you, Christine. Unfortunately, I think it'll need to be said over and over as people tire even more of masks and minor inconveniences. God forbid they be major...

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Barbara MacPherson
9/4/2020 06:08:53 pm

Well said Christine. You are doing the right thing for all your customers and yourself. Keep carrying on.

Reply
Jean
9/4/2020 07:52:43 pm

I’m sorry you had to write that Christine, but glad to hear your side of the story. I’ve been to Mahone Bay twice in August. We wear our masks there, indoor and out. We do take out at the restaurants. It’s a busy town.
I must admit I was surprised you were still closed when we last visited, and wondered if everyone was okay. I’m glad you are.

Reply
Edyepat Best
9/6/2020 06:16:02 pm

Stick to your own principles, Christine. No one stops to think about others’ possible auto immune disorders or chronic illnesses. We must all be mindful of the risks and the protocols in order to stay healthy. Good for you.

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Audrey John
9/9/2020 10:00:38 am

It's your life. Protect it and be safe!! That's all that you're doing and this should be respected. Good for you!!

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Susan
9/9/2020 10:02:56 am

I totally agree with you but maybe you should put more rules on your door sign just so people really get it on your terms.

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Wendy
9/9/2020 10:03:24 am

Sending loving kindness.

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Tara Boyle
11/1/2020 04:57:11 am

What a well written piece. I have nothing but respect for you, stay safe and Positive.

Reply
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