Last evening I was weeding the area around my pup’s graves. Louis, and now my Honey are resting in my garden; large slate rocks mark the spot. I sit a lot when I’m weeding to save my knees, and I took turns resting on their stones. I was struck by the lack of misting eyes; it’s so amazing how time can heal a broken heart. It never removes the entire ache because a true love never dies, but like a drug, time dulls the intensity of the pain. It’s hard to believe that only a few months ago I was a broken damn of tears, my soul dampened by the heartache of losing my precious Honey. The pain was so sharp and searing that I wouldn’t have fought my own demise just to stop the anguish.
I remember how I collapsed while burying her, the soil muddied by salty tears. A loud cry escaped me; surely the neighbours must have heard the mournful wail that echoed off the trees and hill. Shoveling that first bit of soil on her dear little body signified I would never see her again and my heart shattered into a million pieces. With each mound if dirt, the pain grew until a lump of despair threatened to choke me.
Now when I go out into the garden I look at Honey’s grave and there are no more burning tears, only a soft sadness remains, and smiles as I remember the little scamp that stole my heart. I guess I’ve stowed away the sorrow to make way for the memories. I think about the world and how many people and furry kids are beneath our soil, trillions perhaps and that’s a lot of grief for the ones left behind. Of course we never forget them, but we do move on despite the debilitating anguish of losing a loved one. How resilient we are.....