They were quite the pair walking down the isle and at their reception they danced toe to toe, taking a bit of needling for acting like a couple of crazy socks. Everyone they knew attended the wedding; distant cousins, the Anklets and Kneehighs, Uncle Tube and Auntie Crew. A jock friend, Athletic arrived last minute, while the Thrum family flew in from Newfoundland. Grandpa Argyle arrived from the British Isles. The cast of characters filled the first three rows in the church and Sid's brother Bobby, a sock of the cloth, officiated at the ceremony.
Like Noah's ark they arrived in pairs and pretty much everyone made it accept for a couple of Leotards that were totally out of fashion and not missed. At the reception, the crowd was scarfing down the food and watched as Sid did the garter stitch and made a few yokes about his bride. The guests threw rice stitches as they left for their honeymoon.
Their wedding was a blissful yarn and during the honeymoon, a seed was stitched and nine months later they were stocking their family tree with a pair of little sockettes, Knit and Purl. Unfortunately tragedy struck and the Knit one went missing in an unfortunate dryer incident and the Purl one disappeared after being tinkered with by the Afghan Hound, family pet the following week. Devastated by the loss Sid and Sadie didn't have the Red Heart to make any more little socks.
And because knit happens, in the fifties, during a mid life crisis, Sid got an itch and became a woolmanizer, falling head over heels in love with the curvaceous Barbie, the new toy in the box. He gave Sadie the slip, knotty boy, to pursue his new paramour but their relationship lacked stuffing, she was only using him to keep her feet warm and dropped him like a stitch once Ken came on the scene.
Sadie had been terribly hurt, what was she a muggle? Sid knew he was a heel and didn't try to pull the wool over her eyes but hoped they could patch their life together. He didn't try to push his affections on her because she had two long sharp sticks but dropped to his knees and begged for her forgiveness, and when it came down to the knitty gritty, she decided to give him a second chance but not before dropping a few stitches on his legs so he couldn't wander off again. He was grateful for her forgiveness and it saved him from unraveling.
So to advance this yarn forward, although their love had worn a bit thin, with time they were able to patch the hole and lived a darned near perfect life.
**************************************************************************************
Now lets get down to the knitty gritty. The first person to guess how many sock names and puns, wool terms and knitting references I have blended into the above tale you will win 2 patterns, one of Sid and the other of Sadie, in 16 x 16 size on linen or burlap...your choice. Click the comment button above and leave your guess. If no one hits the total I'll choose the closest number. Good luck!