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Touchy or touched?

8/11/2014

18 Comments

 
What’s up with people these days?  Are skins thinning and tempers shortening?  Why is everyone so bloody touchy?    A mere comment can send people huffing away, so insulted they won’t darken your door again?  Are people regressing back to a grade school mentality?  For goodness sake, sticks and stones will break your bones but comments shouldn’t make you do a runner!  It’s time to toughen up people!  

In this changing world common sense seems to have been replaced with a lack of consideration for others, the only question is where was I when they sent out the memo?   First of all I wouldn’t be so bold as to take food or drink into a store but if for some reason, a brain fart occurred and I enter an establishment with a coffee,  and if I was asked to set it down, I wouldn’t get my back up or feel anything but stupid for the mistake I was making. I’d obey meekly, and then have a look around, probably make a guilt purchase to show the store owner I’m not a complete, inconsiderate jerk.  I care what others think of me and go out of my way to not break rules or step on toes.  I guess I’m old school cause this is no longer the flavour of the day.   

Twice last week groups of people walked out of the shop because of things I said to them.   First of all, I get to work and a big ass vehicle, one of those 10 seater, fuel guzzling SUV’s was parked behind the shop and not well, it was taking up two of our parking spaces.  We have little room behind there for our cars as my land only goes to the end of my back bumper and side to side, only three cars fit comfortably.  The other tenant in the building was parked there and then Shane and I fill in the rest of the space.  I squeezed in but I knew my son’s car would never make it and that vehicle would end up being parked in.  That's happened before and let me tell you, the expletives coming out of one woman's mouth, who ripped into my husband because he was parked behind her, I wouldn't care to repeat in mixed company!   

I entered the shop, saw three woman in the back room looking at patterns and asked politely if it was their vehicle.  They said yes and I told them it was private packing behind the building and told them nicely that vehicles can park anywhere along the street in Mahone Bay for free, first come first serve sort of affair.  They said "we’ll leave" and were gone.   I did tell them that for now Shane would temporarily park behind them but they left anyway, almost tripping over themselves getting out the door.  That’s three hookers that will never come back.   I guess I should have the attitude it’s their loss instead of letting it upset me but then maybe I’m assuming…maybe they thought my shop sucked and were planning to leave anyway. 

Then three people of my vintage came in with coffees.  You could tell that they were hot and full by the way they held them.  I politely said, while in the shop could you please set your drinks on the counter.  One of them said, “I didn’t see a sign".  The other said, “There is no sign”.  The third said, “There should be a sign” and they all promptly left.  Now I’m not up on all the rules and curtacies of this world but isn’t it standard not to take food or drink into a shop of any kind.  If you don’t know this, someone should question what planet you’re from.    I have had a sign in the past but it went AWOL, and no one ever saw it anyway because I continually had to say no food and drink.  Since I’ve been open, I’ve told hundreds of people to set their drinks on the counter and probably 85% of them have stormed out the door.   So you're now thinking, why don't I just keep my mouth shut, but you see it's only a matter of time before there is an incident, a trip and spill on someones consignment rug and that's something I don't want to, or should have to, deal with. 

I especially like the kids with ice cream, popsicles and all manner of melting treats, who trot in after mom and dad.  God forbid you say anything about someone’s precious little darling with sticky fingers, they storm out like I’m contagious.  I’m in business to sell things, I do need customers  so sometimes I bite my tongue afraid to open my mouth!  I’ve watched gooey fingers fondle my hooks and quite frankly, it’s stuff nightmares are made off.  One time, an unruly child, after being told repeatedly not to touch anything, did a running dive into a basket of wool with a big sucker in his hand, which he dropped on impact.  I guess I’m supposed to charge extra for the sticky bits on the wool.   The fact that the basket was an expensive antique that cracked on one side from the landing didn’t seem to bother anyone but me. 

And yes, you can help yourself to a coffee in the shop but that doesn’t mean I want you wondering around with it, bending over to look at things.  Set it on the table while you look at the patterns, or sit down and  peruse the blog binders and design book or stand and chat at the counter, common sense would dictate you don’t go walking around? 

This reminds me of a story.  I was once in a quilt store gabbing with the owner.  The quilts were all hand made, no machine ever touched the fabric.  They were very expensive and the sales people were vigilant about handing out white cotton gloves to all who came through the door. Finger oils stain and nobody's hands are surgery ready. One couple came in and they were offered the gloves which they promptly turned down and in a snotty voice, the woman said they would NOT be touching the quilts.  Vicki told me to watch…..she went directly to an all-white, $2500.00 piece of fabric art and ran her hand along the stitching.  Obviously,  I’m not the only one dealing with strange people, but what gives? 

Vicki told me this happens all the time.  Some became indignant and turn on their heel and leave, insulted as if the glove had slapped them across the face.  I think this kind of attitude should be one of the strange phenomenons that's covered on the TV show “Weird or What?”   Splain it to me William Shatner,  cause I don’t get it.   

If I spit out, “ Look people, put your damn drinks down or get the hell out” why I would totally understand the stampede out the door.  Or if I was sarcastic and said, don’t worry about spilling coffee on this one of a kind, custom designed $1000.00 plus masterpiece, we don’t mind....I could understand how that might offend. 

Maybe I embarrass them?  They know better and once it’s been established that they’ve been called on the carpet, they feel ashamed and want to leave?  Or maybe they think their shit doesn’t stink, (a local colloquialism) and how dare that lowly shop keep telling them where to stick their coffee?  But gee, just for a minute, think of how the person in the shop feels about your rudeness when they are only trying to protect their merchandise.  If anyone tripped and soiled a consignment rug, that $1.75 coffee would be the most expensive drink you’ve ever had.....but who am I kidding, I'd be left holding that bag as you skip out the door, refusing to pay for your damage, probably blaming me for having rugs in the store in the first place. 

18 Comments
Christine
8/11/2014 03:12:05 am

I agree 120%.. As an owner of a fabric and wool shop I have had the same experiences. Once had a child spill a can of grape pop over 6 full bolts of brand new fabric, they literally ran out of my store and also had one child run around my shop with a ball of yarn unraveling everywhere she went. her mother just laughed and said " Oh how Cute"!

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Christine L.
8/11/2014 03:23:59 am

I'll bet if we got together we could swap horror stories!

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Nancy
8/11/2014 03:38:42 am

Totally agree. I have gone into a store and my grands have drinks. I kindly ask for a spot to place them. The car was too hot for them and the stop was a last minute decision. You are spot on.

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Brenda Teed
8/11/2014 03:46:26 am

I cannot imagine the reason people would be offended by just asking them to obey a simple rule! Obviously they DO NOT do hand work!!!!!!!

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Adena
8/11/2014 04:12:46 am

People today have such a sense of entitlement it makes me wonder...

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Sarah
8/11/2014 04:13:14 am

I also can't stand it when people bring their dogs into shops.

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Michelle
8/11/2014 04:13:42 am

Kudos Christine, that was an excellent blog!

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Barbara
8/11/2014 04:14:06 am

Great blog today. Somewhere there is a machine sucking out common sense in people. I swear, they are getting ruder and more inconsiderate every day.

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Maureen
8/11/2014 04:14:34 am

They would sing a different song if you put up a sign saying 'food and drinks welcome, just leave your charge card at the cash register to cover any possible damages that may occur'

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Cheryl
8/11/2014 05:08:38 am

I love the credit card idea !
Totally, get your rant. I 'organize' a rug hooking group and the location has requested no food and only drinks with a lid in the lounge where we meet.
Last week, 2 people were eating salad with dressing, fruit and one spilled her lid covered coffee. I told them NO food, there is a lunch room.
I assume I have horns or something judging by the look I got from my 'friends' I should not need to nag. These are all adults.
What can I do, that I haven't tried?

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Tammy Drouillard-Jozwiak
8/11/2014 05:38:40 am

Loved your blog today and I do agree with you. Unfortunately not everyone thinks the same!

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Susan
8/11/2014 08:36:59 am

No common sense (most people know you don't go into any kind of retail store with coffees/teas in hand) and also no one reads anything any more. We have a no food, no camera sign right on the door of the rug museum and 80% of the visitors ask if they can take photos. We then have to do the big explanation about the contemporary, original designs of various hookers and also of the rugs in the market place, copyright and not wanting photos posted on social media sites as we have our own presence both on Facebook and on the web. It's not rocket science!

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Luisa Diebert
8/11/2014 09:35:12 am

I worked in a needle work store and saw the type of damage that people and especially children can do. I had one woman pulling at threads of a piece of hardanger with her nails so hard that I thought she was going to pull out the stitches. I asked her politely to stop it and she continued to pull. I asked again and mentioned that the stitches could come out. She got snarky and said that the maker wouldn't mind. I told her very clearly that this was my personal piece of hardanger and since I made it , I very much minded. Guess who got huffy and left? People have no manners and hate being told when they are behaving badly. I don't think these people were disciplined enough as children and are spoiled ,thoughtless brats. Well that's my ranting story. Good luck. I'm not sure that manners are improving nowadays. Love your blog and totally agree with you.

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Marilyn
8/11/2014 10:13:06 am

Love the blog. Unfortunately, no common sense!!

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Lucy
8/11/2014 10:13:36 am

Totally on your side!

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Randi link
8/12/2014 12:54:48 am

Christine - I'm sure others have written in - so the only thing I'll add is to find a whimsical way to stating that no food or drink allowed in the store - perhaps you can hook it?
When working at a small craft store I had a child playing with artistic matches that we sold (which we thought we kept out of sightlines for little eyes) and we mentioned to the mother to help us watch her child. When the child proceeded to strike the match (and rendering the item unsaleable) the mother mother could not understand why we were upset and was upset with us! So - you are most certainly not alone!

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Nancy Doucette
8/13/2014 12:27:09 am

Christine, I don't always get to read your blog on the day posted or usually make a comment, but on this subject I just couldn't resist. Having worked in retail, I've found people to have become very rude and I'm not sure why this has happened. You most certainly were 100% correct in asking customer to put their drinks on the counter. Even at home people would not (hopefully) have their drinks close to say their beautiful chesterfield, lovely dress etc., so why should they expect to come into a rug hooking shop with many, many dollars of wool, patterns, etc with their drinks in tow....just an accident waiting to happen. Hats off to you for speaking up! If I owned a shop, I certainly would do likewise.

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Theresa
3/22/2017 10:37:04 am

Completely understand and agree. Customers think they own the shop and can do what ever they want. When the phrase "the customer is always right" was coined, it was in a time when people had a higher regard for quid pro quo. Now days people abuse it to see how much they can rip off retail. Many have no idea the cost of running a store - the shop lifting, incidental damage, willful damage. I was at a quilt show with signs posted by these gorgeous designs not to touch them. Sure enough a older woman and her daughter wanted to see the back of one and were handling it without assistance. I asked her if that was her quilt and she said no. I then rudely asked her if she could read english and to get her grubby paws off the art. She wasn't happy at my tone or calling her out. My feeling is, you know it's wrong, you do it anyway then be prepared for the back lash. Political correctness be damned. The rule breakers are counting on us to be passive. We as Canadians used to be a kind and respectful bunch, I wonder what happened, I will restrain my comments on that one. Let's make Canada great again! Call out the rude and disrespectful!

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